10 Things I’ve Let Go and How This Has Set Me Free

Check out this amazing article below:

We fill our lives with so many stressors, adding pressure to an already stressful situation. This article lists 10 things to ‘let go’ of which have added considerable happiness in the author’s life.

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I have a newfound sense of freedom since letting these 10 things go. I am more at peace with myself and far happier with my life.

Source: 10 Things I’ve Let Go and How This Has Set Me Free

The Daily Teacher Podcast – Episode 7 – Comparisons

The influence of Facebook and advertising have made us creatures that constantly like to compare ourselves to others. But in this podcast, I explore the importance of comparison only with ourselves. The grass is greener, RIGHT HERE!

Listen to the podcast in mp3:

Listen to the podcast in ogg:

Check out All by my Selfie, Tiny Buddha’s First Short Film
Follow me:

Twitter: @thedailyteacher
Blog: www.thedailyteacher.com

Some important stuff:

Intro Music: “Take a Chance” from Royalty Free by Kevin MacLeod. Released: 2013.

Outro Music: “DarxieLand” from Royalty Free by Kevin MacLeod. Released: 2013.

Check out Kevin’s other music at http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/collections.php

“All By My Selfie”

There’s just so much to relate to in Tiny Buddha Productions’ first short film (about 10 minutes long), All by Myselfie, which I encourage everyone to check out here.

The film is about a young woman who has just moved to Los Angeles, and finds herself struggling to connect with new friends, through a series of missed opportunities. As someone who has moved several times, this hit home, and offers a very accurate cautionary tale about ‘missed opportunities’.

I wanted to briefly touch on this theme because of its relevance in an ever-connected world. For many of us, the screen is our primary means of connection and contact with the outside world. We text friends, we like items on Facebook as a declaration of ‘Hey, I’m alive and I like this!’…but we sometimes place greater emphasis on this, than on picking up the phone to make a call, or meeting with a friend face to face.

We’ve sacrificed connection and quality for convenience and quantity.

And I wonder if this has had an adverse effect when it comes to our ability to forge new connections. After all, when you’re so accustomed to reinforcing the connections you already have online, new connections in person can seem daunting. And it seems like more and more people are struggling with anxiety, often in a social setting.

I’ve been there, the protagonist in the film has, and I’m sure many of you have as well. We see a person we want to connect with – but don’t. Why? Here are just some of the thoughts that bounce around in our minds, feeding into our anxiety:

  • They look busy.
  • What if they don’t like me?
  • What if we run out of things to say?
  • What if they think I’m a creep?
  • I don’t want to intrude.

 

In a mixed attempt at being courteous, afraid, or shy, all at once, we often refrain from making the connection. And then we’re left with a kind of relentless regret (some of us who are harder on ourselves anyway). Over time, more and more connections are missed and we all lose out on the opportunity to create new and meaningful connections with the people around us.

Having experienced that regret first hand several years ago, I vowed to fight back against all those thoughts, replacing them with other ones. Here’s what I mean: take each of the above thoughts, and push back.

They look busy/I don’t want to intrude – I can always ask if they have time to chat just to be sure. And if they look distracted, just wish them well and be on your way.

What if they don’t like me?/What if they think I’m a creep? – What if they do like you? What if you get along wonderfully? You won’t know until you try. Most people are generally polite anyway, even if they don’t like you.

What if we run out of things to say? – Awkward silences, the big boss of social anxiety (at least it is for me). Silence has been something that I’ve had to grow accustomed to. We often try to fill silence with small talk just to keep the conversation going. But it’s not a bad idea to let the silence linger just a moment. Odds are, the other party (who likely also hates silence) will say something. But beyond this, the best way to combat running out of things to say is to ask open ended questions and show genuine interest. Don’t ask simple questions that can be answered with a ‘yes’ or ‘no’. Ask about their thoughts, their hopes, their dreams, their favourite ________, and WHY. Be curious!

As a general rule, and speaking from my own experience, we always exaggerate the worst that can happen. We amplify how horrible a silence can be, or how embarrassed we may become, or how rude a person may be in reply. We also downplay people’s desire to be civil and non-confrontational. I’ve found that as long as you’re civil and kind to people, they’ll likely be civil and kind back.

So what is the worst that can happen? You realize that a connection cannot be made, you part ways, and you never see each other again. Compare that with the lingering sense of regret that will follow you. Fear, like any other emotion, can be experienced and used in a positive way. It could be an excellent motivator. Try overcoming a fear of making a connection, with the fear of regret that could haunt you forever! In a strange and unexpected way, it worked very well for me.

And anyway, if they’re really a jerk, odds are you don’t want to connect with them anyway! That’s the most likely worst case scenario.

But what about the best case scenario? What if you find someone you connect with or make a new friend? Isn’t that worth the risk of awkward silences, or interrupting someone briefly with good intention? The potential long term gain is massive…but the short term loss (if any) is minimal!

Every single friendship likely started with a connection. Maybe it was a “Hello”, or a question. But these are the seeds that could lead to something truly wonderful.

Why be all by your selfie, when you can be all by your selfie…with friends?

All By My Selfie” teaches us all of these things, and so much more. It’s real. It’s raw. It’s so human. It’s all of us. Check it out. You won’t regret it.

This Is How To Have A Happy Life: 4 Proven Secrets From Research – Barking Up The Wrong Tree

Science has a blueprint for how to have a happy life. In fact, there are four of them. Here’s what you need to know to keep your face smiling.

Source: This Is How To Have A Happy Life: 4 Proven Secrets From Research – Barking Up The Wrong Tree

This Amazing Animated Film Reminds Us To Stop Wanting To Have Everything In Control, But Be Present

We may be spending so much time obsessing over time itself. This amazing animated film shows it’s better to live in the moment.

Source: This Amazing Animated Film Reminds Us To Stop Wanting To Have Everything In Control, But Be Present

A 5-Second Habit to Rewire Your Harshly Self-Critical Brain

If you harshly criticize yourself when you stumble or struggle, try this simple 5-second habit to rewire your brain to be kinder.

What can be done when life gets too stressful and setbacks lead to harsh self-criticism?

Source: A 5-Second Habit to Rewire Your Harshly Self-Critical Brain

You Never Know How Much Time You Have, So Forgive While You Can

We are all human and imperfect. We all make mistakes. And we all have limited time. Forgive the people in your life while you have the chance.

Source: You Never Know How Much Time You Have, So Forgive While You Can

Hitching a Ride on the Cosmos | Menas Kafatos | Pulse | LinkedIn

The universe and the human brain have something important in common. The inner workings of both are invisible. At this moment you have no perception of what’s happening in your brain; neural activity is unknown to the mind of the person to whom the neurons belong without the invention of brain scans to reveal that activity, and then only crudely. Imagine, being a master of a house and not knowing or seeing what is inside the house.

Source: Hitching a Ride on the Cosmos | Menas Kafatos | Pulse | LinkedIn

The Importance Of Progress Over Perfection – The Daily Positive

In this tumbleweed on a windy day speed of life we live in, it’s easy to strive for a superlative schedule. But most successful ventures don’t aim for perfection. Not many in a well-off marriage expect their relationship to be perfect. The most successful businesses put out hypothetical (and potentially realistic) fires every day. You see it’s not flawlessness that we need to seek but rather simple progress.

Source: The Importance Of Progress Over Perfection – The Daily Positive

Zen Buddhism Reveals the Hidden Secret to Not Giving a F*ck – The Power of Ideas

If you’ve read ideas on Ideapod, you’ve probably heard some wise sayings from master Buddhists like The Dalai Lama and Thich Nhat Hanh.

It’s a peaceful philosophy that emphasizes non-attachment and the art of letting go.

But have you also considered that it might be able to help you not give a f*ck?

Yep, by practicing some simple Zen philosophies, you’ll be able to let go of little things that don’t matter so you can focus on what really does.

Source: Zen Buddhism Reveals the Hidden Secret to Not Giving a F*ck – The Power of Ideas